01 October 2005
Cufflink Monkeyface wrote obituaries of inanimate objects. Crumpled cars, faded billboards, rotted houses, and fallen fences all received her notice. She submitted her obituaries to her local paper. They never printed any of them, but Cufflink assumed they were being saved for posterity. She imagined a researcher a hundred years hence perusing the death notice of her refrigerator or the road sign on the corner near her house. It would have broken her heart to know the truth: that the editor discarded every one of her death notices. Fortunately, Cufflink never knew this. She was sustained by her profound ignorance.