08 June 2006
An Excerpt From a Work to be Shipped With Machines That Automatically Paint Portraits of Your Ancestors Based on Your General Body Characteristics
Do not be alarmed by the confines of the portrait chamber. It may look too small, but even those suffering from acute claustrophobia have successfully remained in the zone for the required five minute scan. During this time you will be asked to display certain facial expressions and flex certain muscles. The portrait machine works best if you exaggerate these as much as possible. It also helps to shave your head. And clear your mind of thoughts. The portrait machine works best with a clean slate. Above all, do not be alarmed. There is absolutely no danger. We guarantee it.
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