Conditional Reality

Choose one item from column A and two items from column B. Column C is optional. No substitutes, please. Unless you are family or friends, in which case we will sometimes make an exception. Also note that column B items have been processed in accordance with state and local regulations. Indicate your selections on the form provided. Print in block letters, please. If you make a mistake, destroy the form and start over with a new one. Don’t forget a beverage. That’s column D. Your selections should arrive within the hour. Unless we’re really busy. Thank you for your business.