09 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Human
The most amusing aspect of this hilarious species is that most of its members do not regard themselves as imaginary. But humans are well known deniers of reality. They constantly build things which fall down. They often prefer lies to truth and stories to history. Humans cling to variations of a fantastic legend which depicts them as made by supernatural beings. This view colors every aspect of their lives. They believe their raw material is the atoms of stars. Humans see worlds in mirages and find joy in reproduction. This volume is dedicated to their audacious spirit and insistent misperceptions.
Labels: Bestiary
08 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Radicker
Radickers are microscopic crustaceans that live on brains, specifically the neuroglial cells in area 39, well-known as the section of the brain related to imagination. Once Radickers infest the imagination center they preclude the owner of the brain from believing that Radickers can exist. This is a kind of mercy, though also a debilitating distortion of reality. Folk remedies include having the victim watch horror movies to poison the parasite. Radickers have developed effective defenses to such tactics. They selectively eat only some neuroglial cells. This makes the victim want to shelter the Radickers. It is a thoroughly nasty relationship.
Labels: Bestiary
07 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Menamonium
Menamoniums look like teddy bears and congregate at construction sites where they make cages from the building materials they find. They enter the cages and pose for passersby, who often reward them with bits of food. Authorities usually release them to the wild then destroy their cages. The menamoniums find their way back to the construction sites and rebuild their cages. Menamoniums have been called natural zoo creatures. They invite oohs and ahs. Children are particularly susceptible to their charms and will want to take them home. Parents have learned to tell lies about how menamoniums like to eat kids.
Labels: Bestiary
06 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Severlense
The Severlense is a fur bearing mammal similar to a domestic cat, although much smaller. It begins its life completely blind and remains so for several years. During this phase severlenses can often be found as companion animals of amputees. Researchers believe a rudimentary reciprocal telepathy may be at work. Amputees have consistently reported the strong sensation of severlenses curling around their missing phantom legs and of being able to pet severlenses with their missing phantom hands. The relationship rarely lasts. As Severlenses mature they gain eyesight and usually abandon their amputee companions. Little is known of their subsequent lives.
Labels: Bestiary
05 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Erronion
The erronion is a small songbird, native to Oregon and Washington, with two stubby horns growing out of its skull. The horns, thin and hollow, are a vivid and lustrous red in the male and a muted green in the female. Early European settlers called the erronion “the devil bird” and avoided it as much as possible. Its song is a repeating liquid cascade of nine notes: twee lee klee tu thwp thwp thwp traaaaaaa la. Rock art images of erronion birds are common throughout its range. Natives used to follow flocks of them to find fields of ripe berries.
Labels: Bestiary
04 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Cumulatino
Cumulatinos resemble jellyfish but live in clouds. They have little contact with humans although they have been observed in fog banks and sometimes get tangled up in airplane propellers. Two centuries ago a ballooning expedition by an Italian explorer collected samples of cumulatino which he kept in a humid room in Venice for several years and where they appeared to thrive on humidity. The cumulatinos were a local sensation. Visitors stood in the room while the cumulatinos slid over their faces and outstretched hands. Many returned to the room repeatedly and said the cumulatinos felt like the caresses of lovers.
Labels: Bestiary
03 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Wameker
The wameker produces a natural insecticide in its urine which it deploys in a perimeter at the base of certain species of nut trees. Wamekers thus protect the trees from destruction by hungry insects. In return, the trees produce fruit that only wamekers can digest. A wameker lives its entire life in the trunk of one of these nut trees. The best time to observe wamekers is during a cloudburst. They line up on the branches, toungues catching raindrops, like a string of light bulbs. Wamekers drop to the ground when they die. Ants carry them off and eat them.
Labels: Bestiary
02 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Knitter
The knitter, a close relative of the spider, fashions structures from human hair that can resemble the familiar design of a spider’s web but more often mimics the entwining architecture of pigtails. Knitters are native to equatorial regions where ancient peoples placed them in their hair to make tight braids. The knitter has distinctive tiny claws on the ends of its forelegs which it uses to manipulate strands of hair. Knitters often fall into a frenzy of wild thrashing when constructing their hair designs. Their young sometimes get tangled up in the braids. They harden there like tiny decorative beads.
Labels: Bestiary
01 November 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Skware
The skware was observed for exactly three hours in the summer of 1970 at the four thousand foot level of a nickel mine in northern Ontario. It is the only known sighting of a two dimensional creature. The skware oozed out of the rocks where miners had drilled holes. It floated in the air like a flat mist, then drifted through the head of one of the miners, who screamed and ran. Other miners attempted to capture the skware in a bucket, but failed. They took several photographs. The skware slipped back into the rocks and was never seen again.
Labels: Bestiary
31 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Tastick
Tasticks are pack animals today, but before they were domesticated they lived wild lives on the plains of North America. At that time they stood nine feet tall (twice their current height) roamed in small bands of twenty to thirty adults and juveniles, and fed mostly on a now extinct hallucinogenic variety of mint, traces of which have been detected in the stomachs and bloodstreams of fossilized tasticks. Tasticks probably spent their days in a constant state of altered consciousness. Early human settlers found them easy to tame. Current tastick owners are advised to keep them away from the catnip.
Labels: Bestiary
30 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Quooquoo
Female quooquoos lay a clutch of three or four eggs, usually near people’s houses, often under the bedroom window. In many cultures people with quooquoo eggs under their windows are considered lucky. Male quooquoos cover the eggs with vegetation for camouflage and insulation, then both parents fly away and never return. The quooquoo eggs may incubate for years, surviving hot summers and cold winters. Quooquoo eggs hatch when someone in the host house dreams of a dead relative. Infant quooquoos are airborne within a few minutes of leaving the shell. Most people feel deep sadness when they see a quooquoo.
Labels: Bestiary
29 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Insulat
The insulat’s unique life cycle begins in late summer when insulat shrubs produce tiny bundles of dark green fiber on their branches. These rapidly grow into cocoons which are chewed from the inside by the infant insulat worms. As the insulat consumes the cocoon it grows wings. The insulat takes to the air, navigating one long flight during which it will almost certainly be eaten by a bird. Those very few insulats that survive crawl into the ground where they die. In the spring their wings transform into shoots, which grow into shrubs, which produce bundles of dark green fiber.
Labels: Bestiary
28 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Tomeater
After Gutenberg produced his bibles the scientific community of the day was preoccupied with rumors of creatures living in the binding. They spent many fruitless years looking for them. Five centuries later an archivist discovered a clump of dead insects on some preserved specimens of Gutenberg’s type. Researchers examined the known surviving copies of Gutenberg’s bible, confirming the existence of the tomeater. The insects, tiny, black, and lethargic, hide on printed leaves where they consume the ink. Their life cycle is wholly confined to the page. Tomeaters love biblical verse, savoring every word for years. They reproduce in the periods.
Labels: Bestiary
27 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Fire Leech
Adult fire leeches live in the windpipes and on the tongues of dragons. They lie dormant in forests in their infancy, experience rapid and dramatic growth spurts during forest fires, then migrate to the respiratory systems of dragons. Knights discovered them crawling on the ground after dragon beheadings. Fire leeches have tough outer shells with a high mineral content. They live on flames and require, at minimum, a warm environment. They are shy creatures, preferring darkness when available. Fire leeches can sometimes be found clustered around the hot coals of barbecues. They are harmless to humans but make poor pets.
Labels: Bestiary
26 October 2005
From A Bestiary of Imaginary Species edited by Nenad Dragicevic: Chronofrond
The chronofrond was discovered by a hiker who stopped along a trail and bent down to pick up what looked like a large leaf stuck in the mud. As she grasped the stem it oozed away from her. Subsequent investigations revealed the chronofrond behaved like a rudimentary sundial. The stem-like head cast a deep red shadow onto its own body, which was leaf-shaped. The chronofrond lived in a small and secluded area; however, a craze for chronofronds developed. People displayed them as exotic timepieces. Chronofronds were harvested to extinction. Some preserved specimens can still be found at clock repair shops.
Labels: Bestiary
